March is never a lamb...

Last night as I lay down in my bed getting ready to be released into dreamland, it hit me.  Twenty two years ago tomorrow (March 10) I gave birth to my first born Son. His name is Taylor and he changed my world. I was a 22 year old girl when I got pregnant with him. His father, Trevor, and I had been living together for 4 years by then. It was no surprise that I was pregnant and we were excited and so unprepared for a child. Suddenly, I had to grow up and become responsible and start thinking of someone besides myself. Taylor became my world. Now, he is the same age that I was. I hope (and secretly KNOW) that I have raised him right. He is a good and caring man. I know that whatever happens in his life he will take it on and do well with it. Taylor I love you.
When the porter was wheeling me out of the delivery room the doctor asked me when I was going to have my next one. I said two years.
Exactly two years later I would be in a surgical suite being induced to give birth to my twin boys. They were already named. Had been for months. We knew that they were boys. The first born would be Jason and the second born would be Matthew. I had had a stress test and the doctors believed the babies would be viable to be born at 35 1/2 weeks. They approximated their birth weights at 5lb 6oz and 6lb 2 oz. Big Baby Boys!
My doctor thought that the delivery would be relatively quick and easy. Since I was giving birth at the UofA hospital which is a teaching hospital for every doctor or nurse there was going to be a resident or student attending the birth. It was like a Broadway show! Off Broadway in any case.
So, there was my Doctor and a student, a doctor for each of the babies and a student for each of them, there was a nurse for me and a student for her, there was a nurse for each of the babies and at least one student was with each of them. Trevor wasn't allowed in. There were so many people in that room and it was so stark and cold and brightly lit.
The delivery was long. So very very long. We started with the induction in the morning and I didn't give birth to Jason until evening. Then it took an hour and a half to give birth to Matthew. You see, my little boys were overachievers. They weren't near 5 and 6 pounds. NO. They were each 7 pounds and 11 ounces!! Matthew was unfortunately transverse in the womb. That means sideways. No matter how hard the doctor and nurses tried he wouldn't straighten out and when he finally did, it was a bit too late. Matthew didn't get enough oxygen and he was born without very much brain function. If you didn't touch him first on the toes and run your hand up his body he would have seizures. Oh boy, was he a beautiful baby though! We had an extremely difficult choice to make and we did. Twenty five year old kids should never have to make that choice but we did.  I love you Matthew.  He and Jason were identical. Luckily, all these years I have been able to imagine what he would look like just by looking at Jason. Jason seems to have adopted his brother's personality because that kids has tonnes of it. I love you Jason.
The death of our son also was the beginning of the death of my first marriage. We just couldn't bounce back. There was a lot of love left but the connection was unravelled. We managed to love each other enough to have another child who is amazing. His name is Jake. He's a sweet boy who is almost grown himself. He is 17 years old. I love you Jake.
I have been very blessed with my 4 sons and everything they have taught me. Each one has taught me so many lessons and helped me to be the "grown-up" adult woman than I am.
They are amazing. I don't know how my life would have been without them and I don't want to know. We are having a Birthday Party tonight for Taylor and Jason (and Matthew).
Here are some photos of my boys from Eldest to Youngest.

This is Taylor. He is 22 yrs old tomorrow!

This is Jason. He is 20 yrs old tomorrow.

This is Matthew. He was Jason's identical twin. You can still see the resemblance.

This my baby Jake. He is 17.

February is crazy man...

It's been busy and it's going to get even busier. So far The Wigglians (that's my coven) have been involved in 2 Imbolc rituals. My 101 class did a ritual to finish up their class and my 102 student will be showing us something this week. On Thursday Mojo and I are leaving for Pantheacon in San Jose, California. I may talk about that on the blog but likely most everything I say about it will be on The Wigglian Way.
Not only are/were there lots of magical things happening this month it was my Wedding Anniversary on February 2 which just happens to be Imbolc day. Lucky all the other stuff was scheduled for "in and around" the holiday. Philip took me to a lovely restaurant and he got me a ticket for a dream home lottery. I hope I win. I told you all about that stuff last post though.
Next is Valentine's Day. I don't really celebrate the day but I will likely make some candy, bake some sweets, and make heart shaped sandwiches for lunch. No gifts shall be exchanged. That is...perhaps no gifts will be exchanged.
It's past midnight now. It's 12:35am to be exact. I just finished making some sugar paste for hair removal. You won't be seeing pictures of that. I'll let you know how it goes.
Night sweet World.

Yesterday was a very special day. It was Imbolc which is an ancient Celtic festival associated with the goddess Brigit, held on Feb. 1 or 2 to mark the beginning of spring. It is also celebrated by modern pagans of which I am one. My community and I will be celebrating our Imbolc this weekend. Twice. Once for my immediate community called a Tradition and once for the community at large. One of our group is leading the first ritual and our group in it's entirety (5 of us) will be leading the second one. It will be a busy weekend. 
It was also Groundhog day and apparently Spring will be early this year. It feels like it's today. *S*
The other event that was yesterday  was my Eleventh wedding Anniversary. Philip took me out for dinner at a swanky restaurant called Horizons. It's at the top of a mountain and you have a 360 degree view of Metro Vancouver. It's so pretty.

 We had looked at the menu beforehand so pretty much knew what we were going to order but we looked at the "hard-copy" when we arrived anyway. 
This is what I had for dinner...
Chocolate martini-oh no, I could be addicted. 
Free range bison carpaccio with basil infused olive oil, shaved pecorino cheese (OMG), tomato aioli and micro greens as a starter that Philip and I shared. It was lovely. 
For my main course I had Pekin Duck breast marinated in sherry with star anise poached apple and caramelized yams and a a Chinese 5 spice sauce. Interestingly, I was not fond of the apple dish but the yam dish? It was the most buttery yam dish I have ever had. Melt in your mouth. You know what else melted in my mouth? The duck. Quack Quack. I was confused and didn't know if I was going to get vegetables with my order as they also have a section that says "side order" so I ordered asparagus spears (that I didn't finish). A zucchini and pepper combination came with the meal. This is the only part that I thought was not gourmet and super delicious. It wasn't bad by any means but it was sort of bland. 
For dessert I had a vanilla creme brule. So creamy and well worth the tummy ache in the middle of the night. Seriously. 
Now for Philip's meal...
He had a yummy fruity martini that I can't remember the name of. It may have been the Horizon's "house" martini. 
Of course, he shared the bison starter with me. I think I had the most. It was an adventure for Philip as of course it's a raw meat dish. 
His main course was RACK OF LAMB! He asked for it to be well done. Well done for lamb must still mean bloody because it was but oh so tender and yummy! We gave each other tastes. His side was a potato croquette...I think I will try to make this for a side with bacon wrapped chicken breast and a HUGE salad to wash the bad (but oh so yummy) stuff away. 
Philip had a burnt lemon cheesecake for dessert. 
We both finished up with lovely coffee that almost tasted Italian. 
Thank you for a lovely meal Philip! 

We also exchanged gifts. I got Philip a gorilla stuffy and some boo boo goo  and an iTunes card and he gave me a potential mansion. 

Hey there! I have been so busy crafting I can hardly believe it myself. Mostly I've been knitting. So far I have knitted a number of dishcloths, a scarf, a beanie hat and started a yoga mat bag. I've also deconstructed a men's t-shirt and made it girlie. Because I was in the mood to use older t-shirts that I love but don't find comfortable to wear in bed I made a funky infinite scarf as well. To say I've been inspired lately would be an understatement. I am very tired but excited about everything that it is possible to do.
Here are some photos of what I've been up to. One of these days I will remember to take pictures while I am doing a project then I can share with you how easy some of this is.

 First Dishcloth (this one lives at Mojo's now)

 So soft scarf. 

 Second Dishcloth

 Starting my first hat. 

 Hat finished (I do have a picture of \Philip wearing it, but he's not fond of the picture) 

 Yoga mat bag in the making. 

 Recycled a t-shirt and made this scarf. 

Recycled a men's t-shirt and made it girlie. 

It's been awhile..

So I thought I would write a post about something I am grateful for. It's a couple of  related somethings. They are all medically related.
I am thankful that finally my medicines are starting to reduce inflammation and therefore a lot of the pain. There is still discomfort but it's not nearly as bad as it could be. That my husband can give needles is something else to be thankful for. Thank you Philip!  One of these days I will have to learn how to give myself one. Oh joy!
I've been making it to all my doctors appointments. Normally, I am quite non-compliant, but that leads to poorer health.
I've been able to be more active and have relearned to ice skate. I am not figure skating but I am staying upright. The Vancouver area has seen some snow lately and I've been shovelling that for exercise as well. I've lost weight but find that when I take my medicine at night I want to eat everything I see. I'll have to watch that.
Lastly, I am thankful that I am now waiting on a phone call from the surgeon to remove the tumor on my inner elbow. It's benign  and  not dangerous at all but it hurts and I want it gone.
There you have it. It's all good.

Here I am at Mojo's. It's 9:25 am and I didn't sleep well last night. However, we have a meeting here at 2pm so I need to be here now. Mojo drove all the way to come get me in the morning for a meeting in the afternoon.
Why?
Because it is snowing. Yes, snowing. We don't know how much it will snow by afternoon and because he lives on a mountain it was a good idea to get here early.
I do not like snow. I detest it. Well, that isn't exactly true. Today it's fluffy and pretty and makes everything look clean and fresh. Everyone's yards are equalised and it's all good. The world is at peace. Right?
What I don't like is the cold that makes snow. I like rain in the winter but I don't like snow. I also don't like how it looks when it's melting. I don't like how it looks with salt or ice melt or whatever they put on the roads. I don't like how cold and icy it is so people put that fake salt down that burns the paws of my dogs. Poor guys.
I hate slipping on ice and snow.
I spent thirty seven years of my life in the land of ice and snow. It was snowy and freezing for more than half the year. It wouldn't be surprising to have snow in July or August. I've stood outside waiting for a bus and felt my toes freeze so much that they felt like they had fallen off and were bouncing around in my boot. Not many people know what it's like to feel like there is a chance you could die walking to the local convenience store for milk for your kid's breakfast but I do. Minus 40 is NOT fun. It's not fun in Fahrenheit or Celsius.
That's why I moved here where it is not supposed to snow. That's for the mountains...the REAL mountains (with peaks and stuff).
I want my rain back!!

                                                    Looks like the edge of the world is right after those houses. There aren't mountains out there. Or 4 more cities. 

                                                   Usually, you can see houses out this window.

Every once in awhile I am going to share posts with you from my old blog called

Sparrow in Paradise (one Witch's-almost everyday-musings on life)

 I will share them to show how much life changes or how much it stays the same...or just because I feel like it.

The following was posted January 12th, 2006. Six years ago. How times have changed. I bet they change even more in the next 2 or 3 years. In fact, I know they will. 

Enjoy. 

  Well, it's a new calendar year.I am waiting to see what happens. 

This year feels like it is going to be different.
I don't make resolutions but I am going to have a different sort of a year. I just had my evaluation done at work and I have a few goals there. There are some courses that my boss has recommended and I am looking forward to taking. One is on theory and one will be related to relaxation. The relaxation one will further my goals towards my magickal life. The theory will be interesting at the least.
Also, I have interviewed with a High Priestess to become part of a Circle (Coven). I haven't had that closeness in the Craft for about two years. I really miss the group in Edmonton and am really psyched about continuing the path with another group. It is one that I have been watching for the almost two years I have been here. I should know by tomorrow night or Saturday morning. Then I will tell my very good friend. I hope he is okay with it and knows it doesn't necessarily mean I don't want to cirlce with him. Sometimes we will...but I need a "family".
I've got goals to improve my home so that the family will feel even more like it is a sanctuary. I'd like it to be more organised. I am NOT a great housekeeper so that is an astronomical goal...LOL.
Philip's parents sent us some Holiday money from Ireland and we purchased a huge aquarium with the money. Already, we have 7 fish in the tank. There were 8 but one of the guppy females already died. Jake really likes the guppy family. He thinks it's great that the one male needs at least two females or one will die. Haha, what a way to teach children about polyamory, huh?
We are hoping to get some gourami, angelfish, and a few sharks, but this is a tester tank right now. In fact the kids have named the fish..Tester 1, Tester 2, Tester 3, Testercle (lol) and so on.
Anyhoo, yep, it is 2006 and I feel that this year is one that will change my life.
I hope that yours will be as good as I feel mine is going to be.